A growth mindset is necessary for success

You're not supposed to be good at first. Put in the reps.

Photo by Bruno van der Kraan on Unsplash

Whether you’re building, pivoting or re-starting a business or creative goal, I know what it’s like for things to feel hard, and to wonder if they’ll ever feel easier.

I thought rebuilding my business after burnout would feel like a comeback. It felt more like pushing a boulder uphill.

Momentum created after years of hard work? Gone.

Sales skills developed after countless launches and tens of thousands of dollars invested? Gone.

Confidence built through showing up consistently and doing endless inner work? Gone.

Instead, I questioned God, felt like a failure, and compared myself to an alternate version who’d achieved meteoric success instead of rested inside her house.

But we have to persevere, you and I. That’s what women like us do. This is our purpose.

Now I’m reaching for the stars again, building a movement of women who healed themselves and are building businesses and brands to help others.

If you’re one of these women, this blog will help you develop a resilient growth mindset, upgrade your identity, and take empowered action — even if you feel overwhelmed by starting something new.

What I forgot in the darkness, and what I want to remind you of today, is that you’re supposed to suck at the start.

Just because you were a badass at the last thing doesn’t mean you get to skip the beginners’ stage at the new thing.

It’s okay. You’ll grow. Your skills will improve.

That’s a growth mindset.

A growth mindset says: your skills, talents, and even intelligence are not fixed. As you intentionally practice, you’ll improve.

That might seem obvious, but when you’re in the thick of feeling like an incompetent fool, posting into the void, feeling like nobody cares, it’s easy to think this will last forever.

And honestly, it could, if you don’t intentionally improve.

If you let thoughts like, “I’m a failure. Nothing ever works out for me,” fester.

Not to mention the emotional pain underneath those thoughts that could make a girl spiral and give up.

Learning to manage (and expand) your mental and emotional state is one of the most important things you’ll do as a spiritual entrepreneur.

That’s how I help my clients and Mindset members stop second-guessing themselves and take consistent action.

(You HAVE to check out our Value Your Gifts training. It guides you through a blend of emotional clearing, spiritual identity work, and practical coaching to help you build a mind wired for success — no more positive thinking band-aids.)

How to respond to challenges with a growth mindset

1. Expand awareness around your self-talk.

Do you tell yourself how horrible you are, focus on all your mistakes, where you think you should be in life?

Do you tell yourself it’s HARD? (That’s not helpful. Business requires work, but limiting beliefs are what’s hard.)

Do you have a resigned attitude that makes you want to give up, or do you face challenges with courage and confidence, knowing that you can achieve anything you put your mind to?

Do you shy away from effort, thinking that just because you’re smart, it “should” come more naturally? Or that you’re entitled to results in some way?

Start to notice how you talk to yourself or shame yourself for not being further along, or not having skills you’ve never actually practiced.

This sense of shame for not being further along can make us quit.

Self-talk is what makes people struggle with consistency or avoid doing the scary thing that’ll actually get results.

This isn’t about thinking positive. It’s about mental and emotional resiliency.

My job is to teach you how to think like the most successful version of yourself, the woman who’s bigger than doubt or fear, the woman who’s so locked into her power that confident expectation is her default state of being.

2. Identify a skill to develop.

Feeling like you suck at everything is overwhelming.

Instead of trying to do everything at once, focus.

Identify the highest-leverage skill that will make the biggest impact in your results. It could be a soft skill like confidence, or a hard skill like marketing or sales.

Ask your intuition: What’s my next right step to learn this?

Find an aligned mentor or course, or even head to YouTube, Amazon or Spotify and see what materials you can find for free or low-cost. Shoot, you can even ask Chat GPT.

I recommend learning a bunch of different approaches, experimenting to find what works for you, and then identifying a person or method that most resonates with you.

Pay for proximity to that person to learn not only the skill, but also how they think, because learning how to think is 90% of success in any area.

3. Put in the reps. Release imperfect work.

This is the step a lot of people will skip, and that’s why most people don’t actually create the life they want.

You need to release imperfect work to improve.

You could edit your blog or work on messaging all day, but until you release things and get real-world data in response, you won’t improve.

I get it — it HURTS to not get a result you want. But you need to do the inner work so you’re not so emotionally attached to your results. (This is my zone of genius. If you need help with this, work with me.)

You are responsible for your results. If you’re not getting a desired result, it means you need to identify and develop the skills to create the results you want.

There’s also a spiritual component to this. Think how you always catch typos AFTER you press post.

I can’t count how many times I write a sales email or blog, think it’s great, press publish, and immediately think it’s the worst thing in the world.

Energetically, the moment of learning occurs once your work enters the world.

Seeing every flaw is painful, but that’s growth. You increased your ability by pushing against your limits.

Instead of tweaking the thing you just released, use those sharpened skills to swing again.

Batter up.

4. Upgrade your identity beyond the one who struggles.

This is something I talk a lot about with clients and Mindset members, but your self-concept, or who you think you are, affects your results.

If you identify as one who struggles, you won’t let yourself succeed.

If you identify as a failure, you don’t let yourself aim high.

We get so used to negative self-perceptions that we don’t see it’s not who we actually are.

Tell yourself:

• I am a successful woman

• I am a wealthy, confident woman

• I am a winner

The biggest challenge to identity upgrades are the emotional attachments we have to negative beliefs.

If a belief makes you feel sad, agitated or fearful, you need to release the emotions before you’ll actually believe your new identity.

DO NOT attempt to paste positive thinking over a pile of emotional pain. This will fry your nervous system.

I help my clients and Mindset members release emotional attachments to their beliefs so they can build confident, resilient mindsets and create the businesses and lives of their dreams.

Ultimately, victim-y, woe-is-me mindsets are a way of downgrading our hopes and expectations to protect ourselves from disappointment.

If you want to become the happiest, healthiest, wealthiest, most fulfilled version of you — you need to build the identity of the abundant, wealthy, successful, impactful woman.

5. Emotionally regulate.

Coming face to face with your inadequacies and seeing how you DON’T currently have the skills to achieve your goals can feel…depressing.

Most people have worthiness wounds, and can’t handle failure without feeling like THEY are failing.

YOU are not a failure if you failed. Separate the action from the person.

You are a child of God, and your worth comes from your spiritual endowment.

Even if you’re sensitive or struggle with confidence — I am REALLY sensitive — you can do the inner work to become more confident and resilient.

Rejection or failure doesn’t have to rock you. It won’t when you’re secure in your identity.

This is why it’s so important to have a mentor or join something like the Mindset Membership.

If you don’t have a space to lean on, to remind you who you are, you could fall into despondency and lose momentum.

I’m here to remind you who you are.

You ARE capable. You CAN do anything you put your mind to. The vision in your heart IS real. BUT —

That doesn’t mean who you are right now has the practical (or even emotional / mindset) skills to bring that dream to reality.

And that’s OKAY. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. This is normal.

That’s the entire point of your destiny — to transform you into the person you’re meant to be.

You’re SUPPOSED to grow into this version of you.

Failure will forge you. It will bring confidence and certainty to the surface — as long as you respond to it correctly.

You have so much strength and power within you, but it’s only through facing challenges with determination that they come to the surface.

One day, you’ll look up to see your entire life has changed. Your business will be growing, money will be flowing in, your time will be free, you’ll feel incredible in your body, and at peace spiritually.

But you won’t even be sure how because the whole time, it felt like nothing was happening.

What actually happened was -

You grew and grew, until the results became inevitable.

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I hope this resonated with you. If it did, let me know in the comments.

Here’s how I can help you more:

» Turn your healing journey into a freedom-based business through working together 1:1. Reply to this email, tell me your goals and what’s holding you back. Only a few spaces available.

» Join the Mindset Membership. Experience monthly workshops, community chat and a growing library of spiritual and practical guidance to build a business and life that feel like an extension of your soul.

» Download a free guide to Overcoming Limiting Beliefs

All the love,

Suzanne